vicodincrutch: (going on youtube)
video;

[Blip! On goes the network device. Have an unflattering up angle at the bristly chin of House.]

Let's be real. It's on your calender. And for at least eleven months out of the year you don't think about how warm and fuzzy you are, how far you'll travel or even the prayer you're going to say. People say Thanksgiving and you think about [the network device is now hovering before a plate that's pretty much a small buffet] this.

[Closer! Over the mountain of mashed potatoes and it's lava flow of gravy. He even turns the plate on the counter top. There are voices coming from another room indistinct, so yeah he is taking time to pull away and do this.]

Do you see this? Four days. Four days of this. No regrets.

[Behold the glory of green bean casserole. Beside it of course stuffing. Turkey slices, light and dark. Oops. Too close the screen fogs over. House flips it back around to rub it off on his t-shirt.]

People pay extra for a channel of this. Hours and hours. You get this for free. You're welcome.

[One last look then back to that wrinkled face.]

As I was saying... Thanksgiving should be renamed. That's not how people spend it. It's not how they remember it. Just a day for thankfulness? [Scrunched up thoughtful face as if he's listening for a response. Wait. Is that a veiled positive sentiment? The moment has passed!] Whatever. Day of gluttony. I'm not sorry.
vicodincrutch: (PENIS)
Because we don't have extra room on the hospital admission forms, I will say this publicly:

If you have been bit by a werewolf, vampire, mutant spider, zombie or something infectious, contagious or otherwise pretty vital to your own damn diagnosis please be sure to let people know.

And no more lupine lupus jokes. They're not funny.
vicodincrutch: (the darkside is light)
video;

[Hey network. Here is Dr. House at his desk in his office. He's looking scruffy as ever. Maybe a bit more haggered now that we really look at him.]

Black and white. Blah blah blah. I want to know exactly what is wrong with this picture.

[He holds a small white bottle the portion of it that isn't covere by his fingers shows labels for the City General Hospital prescription for House, Gregory. With an unnecessary flourish he opens the bottle then tips it upside down. Out tumbles one white pill. Just one.]
vicodincrutch: (don't know=don't care)
 For reference, I am capable of giving out compliments that do not have any kind of backhanded insult attached. 

Cameron, you have pretty hair.

Chase, you have pretty hair.

Ta-da. And that's uncursed. I don't know why everyone is so reliant on ass kissing. Anyone can give compliments. When they're doled out on rare occasion like Grandma's fine china it means more. Chew on that.
vicodincrutch: (PENIS)
 audio;

This one is for the literate and illiterate alike
:
vicodincrutch: (Default)
Now I know why fire hose kept popping up on my shopping list. This time you're all lucky. This time.

Why bother? I'll wager to say we all hate you. Unless you're into that.
vicodincrutch: (curse you pan!)
Quick. My watch stopped. What time is it?

Are they gone yet?

[ooc; No House doubles, but anything else goes. All earth shattering spoilers will be forgotten tomorrow.]

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Dr. Greg House, MD

September 2016

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