037. Diagnosis

[vicodincrutch]

Day of the Dead XI now playing in your closest window. Emmett, do we have any popcorn?

For those of us who are insane and not sexually active and need to venture out onset, bring a flame thrower or hockey stick.  Make it a flame thrower. It's better to watch and more sanitary.

Speaking of sanitary, wash your hands and turn your head when you cough, especially around this guy. If you've been just the gosh-golly do-gooders Allison Cameron that you all pride yourself on being and gave him a big bear hug of a hello--congratulations, you're infected. Come see me, just not now. Zombie bite and possible malignant scarlet fever...badass combo. ...I wonder if that would be treatable.

EDIT: Julia. I have your medication. See me after the show.

Comments

[hotfromhell.livejournal.com]

Wonder if you're treatable.

Pretty endearing bozo, tho, I give you that.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

That depends.

...And we haven't even started treatment.

[twin-gunsy.livejournal.com]

They make funny noises when you break them~!

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

Doesn't everything make a funny noise when you break it?

[eiremagic]

They're not attacking virgins?

At least it's not a total waste.

[twin-gunsy.livejournal.com]

Some~times~
heheh ♥
I should try that flame~ thrower~ idea~!

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

Not that I noticed. And it isn't like it is complete relief for them anyway. There are other creeps.

[hotfromhell.livejournal.com]

On what? I'm pretty easy.

Bring it on, Doc. It's a pretty lazy Tuesday for yours truly.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

Right. Go team.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

I told you. Not today. I'm watching the zombie flick.

[eiremagic]

You mean like doctors messing with a huge fucking plastic thing near your privates? Because I was at the hospital for blood loss and some fucking asshole said I needed a fucking pap smear, but I'm not buying that bollocks. Fuck that.

[twin-gunsy.livejournal.com]

Team~?

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

You should have been honest and told them you're a virgin. See what happens when you lie?

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

Figure of speech. Go burn stuff. I'd be careful about the property damage though. People are so touchy.

[eiremagic]

I did. Shithole told me he needed to check for cancer. I came in because I was bleeding out, not because of cancer.

[hotfromhell.livejournal.com]

Tomorrow?

I'm not gonna beg to get an archnemesis.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

You don't know you have cancer until you have cancer, Punky Brewster. And you don't know you have cancer until you check. Cancer doesn't make nice with you to get into your pants, it just comes right on in.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

No need. You have one. Tomorrow though, I'm watching the zombies. Keep it down, will you?

[eiremagic]

I know. My blood would tell me.

[one-of-heaven.livejournal.com]

...a flame thrower.

[twin-gunsy.livejournal.com]

They are~!!

heheh~

I am Noki! What's your name~?

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

If it is anything like that Thrax joker I'd get a second opinion.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

For all of your conflagration needs.

[eiremagic]

No, it's a lot more metafuckingphysical.

I'd know but I wouldn't be able to do anything about it. Magic's a crock of shite, you know.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

Metaphysics and medicine don't often cross paths. Get over yourself and get checked.

...Wow. There's hope for youth after all.