vicodincrutch: (glare/not funny/serious business)
Dr. Greg House, MD ([personal profile] vicodincrutch) wrote2007-10-23 03:53 pm

008. Diagnosis

Friction causes fire. Witches use fire! Friction is evil! Goodness! You know, let's start killing the people who can whistle or snap their fingers.  Fornication uses friction too. 

Here's an idea. Let's get all the witches together and make them follow a separate code of conduct. To identify them, sew some yellow stars on every item of their clothing. And then let's put em into a controlled neighborhood and---Ah, now that I have your attention:

Christ people, the very staple of this place is based on bippity boppity boo. Remember? Your mother probably sniffed pixie dust and that's how half of you came into being. Stop harassing the other morons. Magic is DUMB and an EASY WAY OUT. Fine, I agree but don't be the Gestapo about it. I hate everyone who can run. Can I set them on fire? I will. Don't tempt me.

You all are wonderfully showing how impressionable and controllable you are. A bit of the right magic influence from the City itself and look at what you do. Really now, this curse is unimaginative and based on sensationalism. The original Salem trials ended up hanging only nineteen. Ten more were convicted. Oh, but I suppose the dieties are going all out so this has to be a European witch hunt.

[identity profile] vicodincrutch.livejournal.com 2007-10-24 12:39 am (UTC)(link)
Please do. It helps to bang things angrily. Or for emphasis. Better yet, walk in without knocking then bang on something.

[identity profile] gemini-running.livejournal.com 2007-10-24 12:45 am (UTC)(link)
Quite bothersome, I'm sure.

[identity profile] vicodincrutch.livejournal.com 2007-10-24 12:47 am (UTC)(link)
With practice it'll be perfect at just the right moments.