008. Diagnosis

[vicodincrutch]

Friction causes fire. Witches use fire! Friction is evil! Goodness! You know, let's start killing the people who can whistle or snap their fingers.  Fornication uses friction too. 

Here's an idea. Let's get all the witches together and make them follow a separate code of conduct. To identify them, sew some yellow stars on every item of their clothing. And then let's put em into a controlled neighborhood and---Ah, now that I have your attention:

Christ people, the very staple of this place is based on bippity boppity boo. Remember? Your mother probably sniffed pixie dust and that's how half of you came into being. Stop harassing the other morons. Magic is DUMB and an EASY WAY OUT. Fine, I agree but don't be the Gestapo about it. I hate everyone who can run. Can I set them on fire? I will. Don't tempt me.

You all are wonderfully showing how impressionable and controllable you are. A bit of the right magic influence from the City itself and look at what you do. Really now, this curse is unimaginative and based on sensationalism. The original Salem trials ended up hanging only nineteen. Ten more were convicted. Oh, but I suppose the dieties are going all out so this has to be a European witch hunt.

Comments

[theotokos.livejournal.com]

I'm not surprised, really. It'll just be fairly annoying to put up with. Oh, no, I'm not worried about that, I'm more worried about the stain in my carpet.

No problem, I can get that. Where do you reside?

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

Bleach would be a good start I think. Cleaning up messes isn't a forte of mine.

I'm at the palace place. I have lab work to do.

[theotokos.livejournal.com]

I don't know, doesn't do so well with non white carpet. Eh, I'll figure something out.

Well, that's not too bad a of place. I'm jealous. I'll get this errand out of the way. Your name?

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

I'd recommend getting to know the stain and loving it for what it is. Blood doesn't come out well. Generally seeps through the carpet to the floor.

Dr. Greg House. Do you want a tip?

[theotokos.livejournal.com]

So I've learned the hard way.

Call me Lady. Nah, I don't want a tip -- I'm a demon hunter, not a delivery girl. Consider this a kind gesture because milk is right up there with Southern Comfort for good drinks.

[vicodincrutch.livejournal.com]

Sounds like two of the best comforts-milk and booze.

Lady? Is that a nickname? A work name?